WHY is "As" so Evil?~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"As" is one of the most common mistakes in fiction writing--and the most difficult bad habit to lose--BECAUSE it works with the way we speak -->
Equation form.
Equation Form:
~~~~~~~~~~~
Character + Character = Action/Impact > (which is greater than) Setting.
Example:
~~~~~~~~~~~
--> Jack + Betty = Laughed > (which is more important than) they ate.
Jack and Betty laughed
as they ate.
~~~~~~~~~~~
This is not only how we Speak, it's how reports and all other non-fiction are supposed to be written, so it's how we are taught to write in School.
However, this is NOT how STORIES are written. Stories are written in
Domino Effect form:
~~~~~~~~~~~~
1 and 2 caused 3 and 4 caused 5 and 6 caused 7 and 8.
This happened, which triggered this, which caused this, which resulted in this...
Example:
~~~~~~~~~~~
--> Jack and Betty happened, which made them eat, which caused them to laugh.
Jack and Betty ate and laughed.
~~~~~~~~~~~
It's a simple case of Writing what we're used to Hearing. However it's also one of the ways that editors use to judge the skill of a writer.
In other words...
-- Equation Form Writing = AMATEUR
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
For more information on The Evil "As" and why it's so bad, go Here:
Basic Sentence Structure for FICTION. Read that.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Special thank you to !
Cenakuu for her
Shiny Stamp Template.
`anmari has been spreading her infectious positivity throughout our community for over 6 years. Throughout this time Ana has been at the core of all things devious, passionately developing an eclectic gallery, helping organise devmeets, participating in chat events and also recently completed dedicating her time as a Community Volunteer. We are absolutely delighted to bestow the Deviousness Award for May 2013 to `anmari, congratulations! Read More
Sta.sh
This will be great for my editing. ^__^
Thank you~<3
Well, judging from the advice you give, your editor sure did help. ^_^
Only when I get better though~<3
Okay. ^__^
That'll be a while. xD
I'm still fixing One Day. lol
Correct! "Because" can easily make a sentence come out backwards too. However, it doesn't happen quite so often for the simple reason that "because" tends to show up in Dialogue more than say, in an action scene where Word Order is extremely important to make the picture clear in the reader's mind.